Just yesterday Tim and I had a conversation about how much responsibility it is having a baby in our lives. “I just hope we’ll do a good job at raising our little boy” Tim told me, and I couldn't help but cringe in the inside. I instantly felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. It makes me so nervous every time I sit down and think about my baby’s future, and whether or not I’m cut out for this mom job.
Sometimes I feel like I’m being too hard on myself. Moments of reflection would turn into questions like “How am I doing as a parent?” and it’s difficult not to fall into the comparison hole. I would think of my shortcomings and all the times I have messed up. I would think of the tricky times I needed to work and juggle life at the same time. Being a mom is tough.
But when this does happen and I find myself losing touch of positivity, I would remind myself to switch gears, tell myself that I am trying, I am loving, and I am constantly striving to provide for my baby - and that is what’s most important. I turn to my affirmations to celebrate my own parenting style, and tell myself what I would tell other moms “You’re doing a good job”.
I feel like, as a mom (and as a human being) we operate on a set of beliefs that we trust is good for ourselves and for our family. That is how we survive in this world. The same goes with our parenting styles.
When I would see other moms on social media taking their babies to Paris for a holiday, or making bomb smoothies for their babies early in the morning, instead of feeling lesser of a mom, I could celebrate them, cheer them on, and move on with my day and with my own routine that I have with my baby.
I am going to mom my own way, I tell myself.
When we compare, and try to do things out of our way, we lose track of what’s really important, and succumb into a way that is not being true to ourselves. We are all learning as we go by and there is nothing wrong with making mistakes along the way. It is all part of the process, part of the journey.
Being a mom isn’t about having picture-perfect days, it isn’t about doing things the ‘right’ way, and it isn’t about getting all the things on your to-do list done in a day.
It’s the moments only you know, only your family sees, and the moment you’re in right now. It’s when you wake up in the middle of the night to feed your baby, living on a routine to comfort your baby, and putting your baby and your family’s needs ahead of your own.
Always remember that we all live in our own sweet pace, and achieve things in our own sweet time. So have the freedom to do things your own way, because you are enough as you are.
You're doing great mama!